The Birth of Wan Mikhail

Note: This will be a rather detailed story of how my son was born.
Be forewarned :)

Recap
I had written about how at first the doctor thought Mikhail was gonna be coming earlier than his estimated due date (EDD). So much so that she recommended that I stay home to await labor pains. Doc figured that he might come during raya and she made the necessary preparations with the hospital just in case I was admitted while she was away. Raya came and went and no sign of baby coming out anytime soon. Then, the EDD came and went and again, no sign of baby coming out anytime soon.

Upon the final check-up, the good doctor said that she had to help along the labor process because my contractions were not getting any stronger, the 'air ketuban' was getting lesser and the placenta was mature. Thus, the decision to check me in for an induced labor. Despite the many stories of how induced labor hurts more, I was willing to go through with it. Redha jer...

Midnight Trip to Hospital
At around 0100hrs 21 November 2006, Wan and I packed up our stuff and got ready to go to the hospital. We took some pictures of us in front of the baby's crib, excitedly saying that the next time we entered our room, it'll be the 3 of us, not just the 2 of us and the crib will be occupied.

As I stepped out into the cool night, I have to admit that I felt a bit nostalgic. This would be my final step out of my house as a pregnant woman. The next time my feet touched the floors of this house, I'll be holding my baby... I breathed deeply and sucked the sweet midnight air into my lungs and released it slowly as I stared at the starlit sky.
InsyaAllah... I was ready.

The Pre-Labor Process
We checked ourselves into our room. It felt a bit surreal, being in a hospital room knowing fully well that in a few hours, we'll be saying hello to our son. The very same boy snug in my belly. Of course, I couldn't sleep - I was too excited and anxious. So I spent my time reading and reciting the Quran while Wan slept soundly next to me where the nurses had prepared for him a bed.

Occasionally, the nurses came in to take my blood pressure and (this is worse) conduct the 'vaginal exam'. This is where they put their hand in 'there' and feel for the cervix to check how much it has dilated. It is VERY uncomfortable, VERY painful and VERY annoying. But it had to be done.

At around 0300hrs, they gave me an enema to 'evacuate my bowels'. They administered the enema and asked me to wait 2-3 minutes before going to the loo. I made it till 2 and a half minutes before SPRINTING to the loo. Yeechh...

At around 0500hrs, the nurses came in again to start the inducement process. They inserted this thingy in 'there' to jumpstart the labor process. They said it'll take about an hour before I felt the contractions strengthening. So I waited. True enough, around an hour later, I felt my first painful contraction. By that time, my parents had arrived.

After bestowing several pearls of wisdom, my father left for work while mom stayed with us. I was cringing through the contractions which were getting steadily stronger.

Off to the Labor Suite
Around 0900hrs, a nurse came into my room with a wheelchair and told me that it was time to get myself to the labor suite. I slipped myself into the wheelchair and enjoyed the ride to the labor suite. That was the first time I rode in a wheelchair and I have to admit that despite the contractions, it was fun (yeah, there's still a little bit of kid in me).

Wan and Mama walked alongside me and as only husbands were allowed in the labor suite, Mama took the opportunity during the short ride to give me her final words of advice and support. At the doors to the labor suite, I said my goodbyes to my mom and again I was hit with nostalgia - the next time I went through these doors, I'll be a mom myself.

The Labor Suite was a big room with a huge window facing Ampang. I could practically see my house from up there. It was filled with funny (and scary) looking gadgets and right next to the bed, there was a little cot for when the baby arrived. I changed into the dressing gown and laid down. The nurses started to prep me up; putting in the IV and poking me here and there. Wan stayed beside me and we made small talk... until the contractions started to come with a vengeance.

The Pain
I had spent the last few weeks of my pregnancy asking mothers to describe labor pains. Most of them answered with "It's difficult to explain how it feels..." and "Rasa macam nak terberak... multiplied by a million".

After going through 'em myself, I can only say that you'll only really know how it feels when you go through it yourself. There are no words to describe it, really... but I'll try...

It's like there's a giant fist inside your body that slowly but surely curls itself over your innards and clenches you with all its might before letting go.

Heck. That was lame. That really doesn't do justice to what labor pains are like. Suffice to say, it hurts.

Sometime during the contractions, the nurses came in and told me that they were now going to break my waterbag. This was to help the contractions to come faster and stronger. They gently told me that it might 'hurt a bit'.

Nurses are the Queen of understatements.

The Husband
I cannot imagine not having Wan beside me throughout the entire thing. I shudder to think that we had earlier decided that he would wait outside. I'm SO THANKFUL that in the end we decided that he would be with me instead. I don't think I could have survived the ordeal without Wan. Even thinking back to what we both went through in the labor suite makes me tear up.

Wan was my pillar of strength, my soothing voice of calm and my best friend in there. Whenever I had contractions, I gripped the steel rails on the bed (I had heard horror stories about husbands who were hurt by their contracting wives) but whenever the contractions subsided, I held on to Wan's arms. He was steadily and calmly reciting Quranic verses and Zikirs in my ear. When the contractions were especially intense, he would lower his head to me and whisper the verses with his lips pressed gently on my forehead. As the contractions got worse, I was touched to see tears streaming down his eyes although his recitations never faltered.

There were times when I needed him there right by my side, and times where the pain was so unbearable, I just wanted to be left alone. I had heard stories about wives who yelled and cursed at their husbands, oblivious to their witchiness due to the pain and I had vowed not to subject Wan to it. So I just used hand gestures and fortunately for both of us, Wan deciphered them well. He was there exactly when I needed him, and when I needed him to fade into the background, with a wave of my hand, he was gone.

My husband was indeed my Superman.

The Medical Staff/Stuff
I told you earlier about the vaginal exam... and how uncomfortable and bloody painful it can be. In the labor suite, they conducted 'em a LOT. Everytime a nurse walked into the room and snapped on rubber gloves, I'd wince and start gripping the steel rails preparing for the oncoming onslaught of pain. I began to recognize the individual nurses styles. One was gentle and caused minimal pain, while the other was a ramming bull who acted like I had no nerves down there and another was all 'wham bam thank u mam'.

By the time I was 5cm (for those not in the know, women are allowed to start pushing the baby out when their cervix was open to 10-12 cm), the nurses began to ask me to decide on the pain relief I'd like to have. I had 3 choices, (1) the gas (entonox: provides good pain relief but takes about 30 to 40 seconds to have effect - no known effect on baby), (2) the injection (diamorphine: provides stronger relief as drugs are injected straight into the bloodstream -may cause baby's breathing to slow down) and (3) the epidural (provides strongest relief inserting painkiller through a tube down the lower nerves - may cause headaches, nausea and low blood pressure).
I had initially decided with the gas and stuck to my decision. The nurses seemed very keen on pushing for an epidural but as I could still bear the pain, I declined.

The gas was heavennnnnnn!!!
Every time I felt a contraction coming, I took deep breaths at the entonox mask and felt the blissful effects take place. I was in lala-Land, I barely felt the pain, I was happy... I was high. It felt so good, Wan managed to leave my side for a few minutes to solat hajat by the window. It felt so good, I almost fell asleep, which was VERY bad because I missed the onslaught of a coming contraction and it was too late to suck in the entonox and YAARGHH! Contraction pains hit me once again. But other than the almost-falling-asleep thing, the gas was fantastic. It definitely helped me bear the pain of the contractions which were coming faster and harder.

A Twist in the Tale
Okay, it was now around 1500hrs. I had spent the last 9 hours cringing and stifling screams through the contractions. All the time in the labor room, I was hooked to a machine that monitored my contractions and the baby's heartbeat. As the contractions got stronger, I noticed something disturbing. Everytime I had a contraction, the baby's heartbeat slowed down noticeably.

I thought it was my imagination, but when I saw the concerned looks the nurses exchanged amongst themselves, I knew it wasn't. A few minutes later, my obgyn came into the room. First, she did the vaginal exam (she belonged to the 'ramming bull' school of thought). "You're almost there. 9cm already." Then she stood by the machine and reviewed my records. My heart came to a standstill when I saw a frown etch her usually calm features.

"Ooh... this is not good"
Coming from your doctor, this was NOT a good thing to hear!
"What? WHAT is not good, doctor?"
"Your baby's heartbeat decreases during contractions... it's been going on for quite some time now"
"Allahuakbarrr... what can we do?"
"The good news is that he seems to recover very fast after each contraction and his heartbeat reverts to normal almost immediately... but..."
At this point, the good doctor concentrated on the machine, looked at me with a worried look and glanced at Wan who had been silent all this time.
"The cord may be twisted around his neck... and each time the contraction pushes him down, the cord tightens."
"Oh my God........"
Upon hearing this, I had the insane desire to flee. Take my precious belly with me and fleeee...
"I have no choice, I have to do an emergency c-section. I can't take the risk of you going through normal labor... we may endanger the baby."
"Ok doctor, whatever doctor, as long as we deliver my baby safely pleaseeee"

As the doctor left to prepare the team for surgery and the nurses prepared me for the same, Wan and I held hands tightly and prayed.

The Emergency Caesarean-Section
After 9 hours of active labor, this was not the ending we anticipated. I had done my research on induced labor, epidurals, entonox etc, but I hadn't read a single thing about C-sections. I had no idea what I was going to go through.

As the nurses wheeled me out towards the elevators, I saw my mom and my sister. They took one look at me and the blood practically drained from their faces. Mom tried to get the nurses to tell her what was going on but they evaded to answer, which made mom ever more worried. Wan was racing alongside my gurney and he held on tightly to my hand as I went through intense contractions which were practically one on top of the other. The sensation was that I just HAD to push, but I could not as it might endanger the baby. The pain? Indescribable.

At the doors to the operating theatre, it finally dawned upon Wan and I that we were to part. He could not come in with me and had to wait outside in the waiting room. It was like a scene from a Hallmark movie as we said our rushed goodbyes. And in a flash, the doors closed behind me, leaving me alone with a team of people dressed in light green scrubs and donning surgical masks.

Before I could see what the operating theatre looked like, the anasthetist slipped a mask over my face and in less than half a second, I was out.

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The Outcome
In a haze, I came back from my slumber... to look into the smiling face of my mother... "Hi sweetheart... you have a beautiful baby boy".
Relief swept my entire being. "Is he okay?"
"Yes, he's fine. He's in the incubator and Wan is with him"
"He's beautiful, Medi. And he's got Wan's hair" I turned to look at my dad who was practically clapping his hands and was grinning from ear to ear. He showed me a photo of my baby via his handphone.
I gave a drowsy "Alhamdulillah..." and drooped back into drug-induced slumber.

I was wheeled into the room and still in a daze, I could hear Wan's voice speaking soothingly to me and my parents voices in the background. I could feel tugging and pulling as the nurses checked my IV drip and the catheter. I vaguely recall them giving me instructions on how to press a button to introduce morphein into my bloodstream as a painkiller. I was still in a daze...

Then the door opened and I heard wheels... A smiling nurse pushed a rolling-cot and positioned it right by my side.

There he was...
My baby.

And everything... EVERYTHING was worth it.


Assalamualaikum sayang...
Mommy & Daddy are so happy to finally meet you, darling.
Say hello to the world, Mikhail :)